A Leadership Lesson From My Time in the French Military

Have you ever struggled to follow orders?

I have!

Interestingly enough, I've had more issues with orders I received from authoritarian bosses in high-tech than what I experienced in the military.

Yes, I spent one year in the French Air Force in the late eighties. 

Back then, it was still mandatory for young men to "give" at least one year of their life to the country, primarily through military conscription.

My boss, Colonel Meyer, gave me orders all the time. But these didn't feel like orders!

The reason why?

Not once did Colonel Meyer use the words "should" or "must."

Instead, he provided ample context and left enough room for the team to bring added value.

I recall one specific example of his approach:

Our group was in charge of organizing think-tank reunions between the military and representatives of civil associations. We were four days from the next meeting in one instance, and attendance confirmations were very low.

Colonel Meyer could have been pretty direct, instructing that we should reach out to the list of invitees to remind them of the meeting and secure their attendance.

Instead, he gave us context and options: "I'm concerned our upcoming meeting is not getting the interest we sought from the civil groups. General Ferrand is attending this next reunion. Not having a full house would damage our reputation and limit future credits. Please find out what's going on and report on how we can fix it."

Colonel Meyer's clarity on both context and potential consequences made the whole difference. We knew why the boss was concerned, and we had ample opportunity to solve the problem at hand creatively.

I kept Colonel Meyer's approach in mind. Once I became a leader, I made a point always to provide as much context as possible in guidance to my teams.

What about my bosses, then?

Most of them were great, but a few couldn't refrain from giving me minimal options through command-and-order dictates.

I got frustrated and, at times, didn't react well to these. But with experience, I realized that even the most unilateral orders could lead to dialog and alignment.

You might wonder how you, too, can escape authoritarian tyranny.

It's not that complicated. Just remember to keep your calm and ask one kind of question in return. 

Here's an illustration:

Authoritarian Boss: "Tanguy, you must include this feature in our future product."

Me: Boss, I realize this feature is important to you. Can you give me more insight into what you have observed that makes it critical?

Authoritarian Boss: "This is an ask from Bob, one of our top customers."

Me: "Got it. That's good input. Let me investigate further. We need to find more evidence of how pervasive and urgent the need for this feature is with other top customers. I'll get back to you on this."

I deliberately simplified the exchange here, but in a nutshell, I "negotiated" with the authoritarian boss, turning a one-way order into a more constructive dialog. 

The due diligence might prove or disprove the Boss' direction was the right one. Still, most importantly, I got the context I needed to provide my value-add while respectfully challenging a single-way order.

At any rate, I trust you're not that authoritarian boss!

So, remember always to provide enough context in your guidance to your team. From there, let their expertise do the magic on how to solve the challenges you're throwing at them!